Very Bad Haiku

In case you live under a rock, haiku is a Japanese-style poem consisting of three lines, with 5, 7, and 5 syllables per line, respectively. Here are some particularly amusing ones:

Bananas in cars
Get stinky in the sunshine
Please eat them at home

There's not enough beer
Up, down, far, wide or near, to
Want to kiss you, dear

I miss you like the
Cat who used to poo in my
delivery van

Acoustic guitars
And dirty feet do not make
you sing like Dylan

Asparagus pee
What a mystery are thee?
Like the honeybees

Blink 182
Oh dear, what happened to you
And your nakedness?

No, I did not take
Your Jello Poke birthday cake
You ate it, fat boy!

Noisy intestines
Gas at the reference desk
Should I let one fly?

Curious feeling
This thong I am wearing now
A paid-for wedgie

What the hell is this
Everything I own is pink
Red sock washed with whites

Big Mouth Billy Bass
Given as a birthday gift
Fifty percent off


And my favorite....


I told her and she
Was like, "Oh my God," and I
Was like, "Oh my God."